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Friday, February 19, 2010

Grow into Your Dream


Sir Edmund Hillary was the first man to climb Mount Everest. On May 29, 1953 he scaled the highest mountain then known to man--29,000 feet straight up. The world lauded him. England knighted him for his achievement.

However, it’s little known that Hillary had to grow into this success. You see, in 1952 he attempted to climb Everest, but failed. A few weeks later a group in England asked him to address its members.

Hillary walked on stage to a thunderous applause. The audience was recognizing an attempt at greatness, but Edmund Hillary saw himself as a failure. He moved away from the microphone and walked to the edge of the platform. He shook his fist at a picture of the mountain, and yelled, "Mount Everest, you beat me the first time, but I'll beat you the next time because you've grown all you are going to grow... but I'm still growing!"

Dreams you fail to reach can be conquered later through personal growth. When you first make your attempts you may have made inadequate plans. You may have lacked some skills. You may have partnered with the wrong people. You may have offered an inferior product.

Whatever the reason for initial failure, you can amend yourself and try again. If you desire a thing with enough passion, you can achieve it in spite of multiple failed attempts.

You may need to read more on the subject, take some classes, consult an expert, ask for feedback from trusted associates, or you may need to work a little harder.

See, you can grow. You aren’t stuck with your current weaknesses. You can chip away at these weaknesses. You can learn new skills. And with growth, you can conquer your personal Everest.

Sir Edmund Hillary is known as the conqueror of one of the greatest achievements in history. Yet, he had to grow into his success.

For what great achievement will you be known?

You can grow into it.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Buka Dulu Topengmu


Tapi buka dulu topengmu,
buka dulu topengmu
Biar kulihat warnamu,
kan kulihat warnamu

Itu katanya Peterpan. Mendengar lagu itu di radio, sambil nyengir aku jadi inget sama berita yang masuk ke BB-ku baru-baru ini. BTW...ini kisah nyata abad ini lho... brace yourself...here it is:


DUBES ARAB BATALKAN PERNIKAHAN GARA-GARA CALON ISTRI BERJENGGOT


Seorang duta besar (dubes) Arab membatalkan pernikahannya setelah mengetahui kalau calon istrinya ternyata punya jenggot dan bermata juling! Selama ini wajah wanita itu selalu tertutup cadar.

Demikian seperti diberitakan media Arab berbahasa Inggris, Gulf News dan dilansir kantor berita AFP, Kamis (11/2/2010).

Sebelumnya diplomat Arab tersebut cuma beberapa kali bertemu dengan calon istrinya itu. Dan tiap kali pertemuan, sang wanita selalu menutupi wajahnya dengan cadar.

Setelah pasangan itu menandatangani kontrak pernikahan, sang dubes mencoba mencium mempelai wanita. Saat itulah, pria yang dirahasiakan identitasnya itu mengetahui kalau wanita itu memiliki jenggot dan bermata juling.

Melihat kenyataan itu, sang dubes pun menuntut pembatalan kontrak pernikahan. Dia juga menuntut ganti rugi sebesat 500 ribu dirham (sekitar Rp 1,2 miliar) atas perhiasan, pakaian dan barang-barang lainnya yang telah diberikan untuk wanita tersebut.

Dalam persidangan di pengadilan syariah di Uni Emirat Arab, dubes tersebut mengaku telah ditipu dengan pernikahan tersebut. Sebab selama ini ibu wanita tersebut telah memperlihatkan foto saudara perempuan calon istrinya, bukannya foto wanita itu sendiri.

Pengadilan memang mengabulkan permohonan sang dubes untuk membatalkan pernikahan tersebut. Namun pengadilan menolak tuntutan kompensasi yang diajukannya.


Pria Bertopeng? Wanita Bercadar?

Saya kira dua-duanya sama aja. Don't we like to cover ourselves in fear of rejection, in the uncertainty of being valued and accepted for all we are, for being ourselves?

Di jaman dulu ada juga nih yang kena batunya...gara2 cadar. Pria malang itu adalah Yakub, saudara kembar dari Esau, cucu dari konglomerat Timur Tengah Abraham, yang nama besarnya dikenal dimana-mana.

Yakub jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama dengan seorang gadis yang masih terhitung sanak keluarganya. Gadis itu, Rahel, elok sikapnya dan cantik parasnya. What a rare combination these days!! Berbeda dengan Lea, sang kakak, yang menurut catatan yang kubaca, memiliki mata yang tidak berseri.

Nah, sangking sudah mabuk kepayang cintanya pada Rahel, Yakub sama sekali tidak keberatan untuk bekerja selama 7 tahun -sebagai gembala ternak- bagi calon mertuanya. Aduh...kalo dipikir-pikir, cinta itu dahsyat juga ya. Masa sih 7 tahun serasa beberapa hari aja. Tanpa dibayar pake duit laginya. Wuihhh...Jacob was a fool for Rachel!

Setelah tiba waktu 7 tahun, hari yang dinanti-nantikan pun tiba....THE WEDDING DAY!

Menurut tradisi pada masa itu, seorang mempelai laki-laki tidak diijinkan untuk melihat wajah pasangannya, sampai setelah upacara perkawinan berlangsung, dan mereka masuk ke tenda privat mereka. And... when the celebration was over... Jacob, almost lost his mind with all the waiting he did... opened up the veil on his bride's head...only to find that he had married the WRONG one!


Topeng dan Cadar dalam Pernikahan

Orang bilang, emangnya nikah itu kayak beli kucing dalam karung? Musti kenal dulu dong sama 'kucing'-nya...hehehe. Well, idealnya sih begitu. Makanya banyak pasangan yang kemudian mengambil langkah "pe-de-ka-te', seperti halnya pasutri yang kukenal beberapa bulan belakangan ini. Pernikahan mereka sedang dilanda badai. Penyebabnya...klasik, ...orang ketiga. Sang suami tidak habis pikir mengapa istrinya begitu mudah kepincut dengan laki-laki lain yang notabene adalah kenalan mereka juga dan tinggalnya hanya 1 blok di belakang rumah mereka.

Ternyata masalah mereka yang kemudian menjadi pelik ini dimulai dari berbagai ketidakcocokan dan mis-komunikasi yang berkembang menjadi ketawaran dalam perkawinan mereka.

Apakah mereka sempat belajar saling mengenal waktu berpacaran dulu? Apakah ada tahap 'pe-de-ka-te' yang membuat mereka masing-masing nyaman untuk saling membuka topeng dan cadar mereka?

Menurut sang suami semasa pacaran dulu mereka sering dinner bersama, jalan-jalan ke mall dan nonton bioskop. Very common... Then I asked him, "kalian ngobrol apa aja kalo lagi jalan bareng."

"Ngobrol sih...tentang... tentang...ummm...apa ya? Lupa."

"Gubraaakss!!"

"Gak inget lagi. Ya..kami gak banyak ngobrol deh kayaknya waktu itu. Aku juga udah kepepet harus segera married, karena papaku sakit-sakitan."

No wonder. Istilah 'pe-de-ka-te' yang sering terdengar itu ternyata bermakna...jalan bareng, dinner di luar and nonton bioskop. Malah ada yang langsung ke grepe-grepe.

No wonder...topeng dan cadar itu masih saja nempel di wajah bahkan setelah mengatakan, "I do" di depan pendeta.

No wonder... pernikahan kemudian dipenuhi kejutan-kejutan warna-warni, seperti percikan mercon dan petasan di malam tahun baru, karena topeng dan cadar yang mulai terbuka perlahan-lahan.

Aku jadi kepingin nyanyi bareng Peterpan...

tapi buka dulu topengmu...

buka dulu topengmu...

biar kulihat warnamu...

kan kulihat warnamu....

When are You Gonna Settle Down?


"So, when are you gonna settle down?" I heard my friends ask me. Well, to be frank, this is not the first time somebody ask me this kind of question. I've grown accustom to sound of it. Heard it in family gathering, old friends reunion and small group family dinner. The exact words might vary but the ultimate curiosity of these well-meaning friends and family is...they wanna know when will I decide to 'settle down'.

What is this idea of settling down? To get married, have kids, start a family...?
It is as if by being single would mean that you haven't got there yet. That you are still somewhere there up in the ozone.

Seems like life is not complete yet, like you have not live your life... NOT COMPLETE ...yet.

Uhhh...I could not shake this thought. So bothering me!

Does it mean, as long as you are not married - you only live half way of the portion of joy, enthusiasm, exuberant life you suppose to have?

To be honest - I feel quite satisfied with my singleness. I'm not lacking anything. God supply me with all the joy I need. If I do get married one day, it won't be for the reason of fulfilling the emptiness in the heart, NOPE!

Because being single with the Lord, with friends and family that love me - I'm quite full. My cup runs over with passion and joy. I'm excited of being me - being the single woman I am, the person I am, created in the image of God, to do the good works according to His great pleasures.

(behind the steering wheel on a hot, dusty Saturday)

Confession of a Bookoholic


On a rainy Friday,
"We really shopped today huh?" I said to her , looking at the shoe boxes and the other plastic bags. There were great sales today at Fladeo and Yongki. She smiled at me and said, "So, what did you call all those visit you made to the bookstores last week, the week before and the week before that? I saw you came out with plastic bags, with books in it!"
Whoaaa...busted!!

Well, to be honest, I won't call "that" shopping! :) Walking out with books from the bookstores I visit seems natural for me. I call that researching...

I shop for books everywhere. Bookstores in the airport, hospitals, hotels, malls... secondhand bookstores, even in a thrift stores in the suburb of America. Every time I go overseas, I would always hunt for the bookstores in that city. So, me and books... we are buddies for life...

And I don't consider that shopping.

Until it downed on me today!!

How can i not consider buying books as shopping... and getting a pair of FLADEO shoes as big time shopping?

Monday, February 8, 2010

When you say, I love you...


In the ICU that evening... He rubbed her bald head, looking into her now dimmed eye sight, he whispered, " Go ahead, rest now. I love you..."

I could not shake of that picture. She used to have long, thick, black hair. Beautiful and wavy. Few weeks ago, all was shaved. Bald.

My old friend was battling ovary cancer. They found out about this 6 months ago, about a year after she gave birth to her second son.

I may think that cancer is a merciless and deadly enemy, but what I saw that evening was something cancer could not kill.

What is it with this idea of 'falling in love' that I'm so used to hear every single day? What are people 'falling' for? Good looks? Muscles and biceps? Long eye-lashes and rosie cheeks? or... long, black, thick hair?

When couples say 'I do' by the altar - do they really know what's in for them? Are they even prepared for the worst scenario life will offer them?

That evening, in that ICU room, I witnessed something that Ovary cancer could not kill, something death could not take. I witnessed love... so gentle, committed and true to the end.


In loving memory of the late Pola Renta Glen...

A writer

Kutipan dari Dee...
Rasa ingin tahu seperti itulah yang selalu berusaha saya artikulasikan saat ditanya: apakah modal terbaik seorang penulis? Seorang penulis adalah petualang. Ia berjalan menuju tempat-tempat dalam dirinya dengan lebih rajin dan lebih eksploratif ketimbang turis biasa. Ia tidak mengambil “paket wisata” bersama serombongan orang banyak lainnya. Ia pergi sendiri, berbekal intuisi dan rasa ingin tahu, siap dengan risiko tersasar, gagal, dan jadi gembel. Ia mengamati, bergelut dan bergulat dengan pengamatannya, kemudian meramu dan menyajikannya bak seorang koki menyuguhkan hidangan terbaiknya.

Seorang penulis tidak mutlak memiliki kehidupan dan pengalaman pribadi yang serba luar biasa. Namun seorang penulis harus memiliki hasrat menggali yang luar biasa, yang menjadikan hal kecil sekalipun menjadi istimewa dan bermakna. Ia mampu menemukan mutiara dalam setiap pengamatan, dalam setiap penelusuran. Dan yang lebih penting, ia mampu menyampaikannya dengan jernih. Bukan untuk siapa-siapa. Tapi untuk dirinya sendiri. Seorang penulis berkata-kata bukan untuk melayani orang lain, melainkan untuk menuntaskan keingintahuannya sendiri terlebih dulu.